Behind the eight ball

I had a dream…a goal really. I wanted to publish a story every 6 months. That’s not too ambitious…right? I mean…what could go wrong? I have stories that I’ve finished and I just needed to give them one last look through/critique and then I would publish them and that…would be that.

God I’m delusional!

I am still critiquing the first few chapters of my next book and my dealine was MARCH! Do you know what month we are in now?

MAY!

Where is the time going? Seriously…who took it?

Deep breath…deeeeeeepppppp breath.

So I’m trying to crack the whip on myself, get motivated to do what I need to do. But’s it hard…no lie about that. I get distracted or stressed or just…lazy. I lose sight of my dream and go off on a tangent.

And I just want to say…it’s okay to do that.

Sometimes you need to get lost in order to find the way that’s going to work for you and there is no shame in that. It’s all part of the learning process, the growth that we have to do.

With that said…I have to go do some critiquing and editing.

Happy writing!

XO

Advice time

I know…I’m still a new writer and I can’t have too much advice to give.

Wrong!

I have learned a bit from my rejections, my critique partner, reading…just life in general and I think that some of the things I have picked up can be helpful to others.

1. Never stop. I do mean that literally. even when you are tired and you think that you just suck…keep going on. This applies to every aspect of life really, but especially in writing.
2. Keep reading. reading keeps the mind sharp, keeps you up on any “trends” and in general keeps the juices flowing. How many times have you read a book, a story and thought “What if I did…instead?”
3. Be kind and open. Parting of being a good writer is being open to new ideas, constructive criticism and things changing.
4. Be voracious. You have to want it…more than anything, even sleep.
5. Be selfish. There are going to be people who will not respect what you do. they will take advantage, disrespect or just not understand what you are trying to do. If you have to, carve out the time and turn everything off until you get that chapter finished.
6. Be firm and polite.
7. Ask questions…all the time. This keeps the juices flowing and the ideas fluid.
8. Shoot for the moon but keep you eye on the ground.
9. Be confident.
10. Stay humble
11. Be willing to sacrifice. IF this is your passion, nothing will stand in your way. There are of course things that are more important, but sometimes…writing will take 1st place. Be ready.
12. In the same vein…be willing to give. Some people won’t get it and you have to be understand and giving with them.
13. Keep distractions to a minimum. Facebook, Instagram, twitter, etc…At first they are fun, but then…days have gone by and you haven’t written a word.

Goals and aspirations…

“There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”

Ernest Hemingway

There are some people who go into writing hoping for fame and fortune. They are under the impression that after the 1st book, there will be fanfare and adulation…people will be stopping them on the street begging for autographs.

Let’s get real for a moment…

Though that does happen to some, for the most part, it is hard work. It is literally bleeding on paper, hoping for something to flow that others will connect with, that others will love as much as you. It is putting little pieces of your soul paper, praying that others will take care of it the same way you did.

to be honest, when I first started writing, that is what I thought would happen. What can I say, I was young and ignorant. Now, my aspirations may be similar, but with a much deeper meaning. My first intention with my writing has been and will always be to showcase plus-sized heroine’s. There is nothing more upsetting than trying to get into a story and not being able to see yourself in the character. It’s enough to put you off reading…almost. There are some characters that are plus-sized, but they are few and far between, and they are often of the the “woe is me” mindset. I can not stand that! I know quite a few women who are proud of themselves, love the body they are in and show it off to the fullest. Those are the women that I want to capture, that I want to showcase to the world.

I also love to see interracial romances. Again, it’s hard to find stories like this and I feel that they deserve a place on the shelf. And not necessarily always full of racism either. Yes…it exists. I am well aware of it. But it’s not the only thing going on in relationships of mixed race. There are other issues that need and should be covered. We read to escape and while there needs to be realism…we do not need to always be hit over the head with it.

those are the real goals, the things that motivate me and keep me plodding along when it feels that my eyes are closing and my brain is empty. I still have dreams of being on the bestseller list and having a few lifetimes movies under my belt.

Okay…I have those dreams a lot.

I also dream about making an impact on someone’s life, helping them find love even it’s with themselves. I want to show women that having love is good, great even, but loving yourself is more important.

What are some of you goals, dreams, aspirations for writing?

Top Ten Books

It’s been a while, but let’s pretend that it hasn’t. I want to talk to you about books. Not just any books, but the top ten books on my list…so far.

These are books that if the zombie apocalypse happened, I would have to take them with me…or hunt them down in now abandoned libraries and books stores. These are the books that bring a smile to my face and I always go “oooohhh…I remember that book.”

1. Little House on the Prairie – we’ve already talked about my love of this series so I won’t bore you again.
2. Interracial Intimacies – Not so much fiction as it was a book that provided a great deal of insight into the relationships between black men and women and some backstory on why things are the way they are. I wouldn’t say all the hypotheses' are concrete, but they do open one’s mine to the workings and the why’s of some issues that seem to plague black relationships.
3. Micaville's Letter to the Prince – it was required reading in my political science class and I have to say it left a huge impression on me about politics and how things work.
4. Where the Wild Things Are – I loved this book. I did not see the movie, but the book still resonates with to this day. I have to find it so I can read it to my children
5. Harry Potter series – just good fun with morals and principles thrown in. Loved them.
6. Where the Sidewalk Ends – I need the 30th anniversary edition with the new additions. That is something I will definitely be putting on my child’s bookshelf.
7. Any Dr. Seuss book…ever! They were all so colorful and full of stories and parables that even now, I can think of the lessons that I learned from them.
8. Wishes by Jude Deveraux– my first book with a plus sized heroine. I LOVED THIS BOOK! I read it so much that the spine broke and I had to tape the pages back in. This was the start of my desire to write stories that did not fit the mold. Heroine’s that weren’t “standard”. The end did leave a bit to be desired, but the concept was just…magic for me.
9. The Donovan Series by nora roberts – loved this series. It was also an introduction to the art of two POV’s going on at the same time. Even now I wonder why more people don’t do it. I as a reader really want to see what is going on in the other person’s head. Is that weird?
10. Last but not least…Ina Garten. I’m serious. I love her cookbooks. They read like books and anytime I get one, I have to sit down and read through it. Of course I mark the stuff I want to try, but the writing style of these books is just…I’m in love.

So…now to you. What are some books you just have to have no matter what? Let me know in the comments.

Getting over the hump

You know the feeling….the blank computer or page in front of you…the pen in hand…some good tunes in the background. You hand it hovring over the keyboard or paper…you’re excited. The blood is pumping and you just know it’s going to be good.

2 hours later…

Yea…I get that too. Sometimes, I just stare at the ceiling, fingers poised over the keyboard till my wrists cramp up and I take a nap. During the nap of course, I get all kinds of ideas but then when I have to put them to paper…ugh

Let’s discuss how to combat this dreaded issue…or at least how I go about it.

1. I like to reread the story that I’m working on. Yesssss…the one that is giving me the writer’s block. Sometimes, I can lose sight of where I’m going in the story, what I’m trying to achieve. I go back through to see where I was going, what the mood was or where the characters are at in their growth. A good chunk of the time, it does get my juices flowing again. And if not…I can get some editing in while I wait.
2. I like to read fan fiction (dodges a few tomatoes). Seriously, good fan fiction is some good stuff and can get the juices flowing again. It give your mind a chance to shut off and reboot, which can help in jumping the hurdle of finding something to write.
3. Music…just music. It helps relax the muscles, soothe the soul and calm the spirit.
4. I have a dog and I like to play with her during these times. Sometimes, we talk. Or I talk to her and she just looks at me like “I have no idea what you are talking about.” I bounce ideas off her, I chase her a bit and in that time, my mind unwinds and loosens it grip on my creativity. At least enough to get another paragraph in.
5. I like to edit my other stories. Usually these are stories that I’ve finished and need to be critiqued. I will go through them and edit, all the while my other story is in the back of my mind, stewing.
6. Last but not least…I do use some social media. Again, this is a time to unwind. What I may do is use this opportunity to promote my blog or a story that I’ve finished…perhaps see what the trends are in the book world. Other times, I just goof off and give the brain a rest. You can push yourself too far and maybe the writer’s block is there for a reason.

 

Now that we have talked about my strategies… what are some of yours? I would be very interested in what works for you. Leave me a comment.

Making an impact

Have you ever read a book so good that it stays with you for not just weeks or months, but years and decades? And each time you open the book or even just see the cover, you are taken back to that moment when you first read the book and your whole life changed?

Let’s talk about mine for a second.

There is one book…okay one of a just a few…that changed my life. It stuck with me and even today, I can think back to the first time I cracked it open, how excited I got to read it, how just looking at it made me feel happy and alive.

Little House on the Prairie

Don’t laugh…I’m being completely serious here. The whole series really started me on my journey of a love of reading and books and just…everything.

The first thing that stuck me about the entire series is the closeness of the family unit. I liked that aspect of it. It reminded me of my own family, even though at the time we were far apart, we were still a unit and deeply loyal to one another.

I also liked the wholesomeness about the whole series. Of course, at the time I think I was like 8 or 9, but still. No blood and guts. just day to day living and struggle. Never giving up and always taking the high road, even when you wanted to knock someone out. I liked it and still do.

Laura was definitely my favorite character. Of course, the books were mostly centered around her, but still. I liked her independence, her love of family, her pluckiness *LOL* I wanted to be her in a sense. Still do at times.

Reading the books was vastly different from watching the TV series and honestly…this is when my dislike of movie and TV adaptations of books started. You can not imagine the intense disappointment I felt when things did not happen like they did in the book, even if it was impossible. Just don’t do it then! Ugh…*deep breath* Let it go Desiree, let it go.

This series in part, definitely had a hand in shaping how I thought the world should work. That spark of independence, that wonder in adventure and devotion to family. Along with my family and how I was raised, the books unquestionably had a part in making me who I am today.

With all that being said, I ask you:

What book/books had an impact on your life? Is there a book out there that you take with you if the zombies attacked?

Let’s talk about them.

Author rituals

Talk to any author and they will tell you that they have things that must be in order for them to write. All the stars must be aligned, the gods must be good and there must be certain things within reach. If these things are not in order, the words will not flow, the muse will flee and there will be no goodness for anyone to read.

For me the list is short and concise:

1. A cup of tea, preferably a nice robust chai. The tea keeps me calm and focused. I do drink other teas, but chai is my favorite. Something about the spice and heaviness that makes it easier to write for me.
2. A pencil. So…I don’t really like to write on the computer first. I like to put pen or pencil to paper first then write up things later. My mind works way too fast for me to type on the computer, leaving words out and it’s just generally a mess. Pencil and paper is the way to go…at least for me.
3. Fresh paper. No wrinkles, no stains, no tears…nothing. If it’s not fresh…I can’t do it. I  don’t know what it is, but scrap paper makes me feel uncomfortable and I just…I just can’t.
4. I prefer a notebook or a notepad. A sheet of paper is not going to cut for more than one reason. I need to feel the thickness and smoothness of paper under my hand.
5. I do need music to write. Depending on the mood I’m in, the music can set the mood. Sexy mood for love scenes, hard angry music for fight or action scenes. Sometimes I just need something in the background to keep me focused and from getting distracted by anything that might happen in the background. Music…soothes the soul.

 

What are some of you rituals? How do you get the flow going?

A writer’s toolbox

Sometimes…you just gotta be prepared. There are only a few things that I need to write. Few, but important and crucial. If something is missing from this list when I go to write…things can get ugly REAL fast.

#1- My laptop. I have all my rough drafts, copies, ideas, book trailers, story ideas…everything is on this baby. I do have a flash drive and I frequently back up to my external drive, but this laptop…is my baby. I take it to a local coffee shop when I want few distractions, on the porch when I want to watch the dog run, on trips when I think I’m going to get some work done. Its portable and makes things easy. I can say that I would like to have a desktop, but that would be mostly for games and day to day stuff. I save the laptop for writing.

#2-A pen. But not just any pen. I can’t do ink pens or gel pens. Something about them makes me feel off. I have to use a ball point pen and the cheap ones are my favorite. The fancy ones are nice, with the gold and silver, but the weight is heavy and they often have stuff on them that gets in the way of my fingers, irritating the skin on them. I stick to the bic pens or even the ones you get from the hotels. FAVORITE!

#3- I also need a pencil. A long one with a good eraser. I prefer to keep it sharpened, no dull lead for me. The mechanical is okay, but the weight of it just does something and I can’t write with it for long. An old school #2 pencil all the way for me.

#4- I use the word program to write. Nothing fancy, but it does all my formatting that I like and it can save it for me from one story to the next.

#5- The kicker…I like to lay on the floor and write. Not hardwood, carpet please. Freshly vacumed if possibly but at least nothing so dirty that things are growing in it. Using a desk of or a counter…does not work for me. I can’t get into the flow of things and stop after like 1/2 a page. On the floor…I can write chapters. Just swinging my legs back and forth, scribbling away. Ahhh…good times.

What are some things that you need in your writer’s toolbox to write?

Inspiration

I’m often asked where my ideas come from when I’m writing. Okay, not all that often, but enough that it has me thinking about it and what my answer is. Especially when I’m having issues writing, when I hit a road block, when the typing just stops and the page is blank, mocking me with it’s…blankness. So, with that, I had to think hard about where my lighting is more likely to strike

Work: I work part time in retail, so I see a lot of people come and go. I get their life stories and all the drama of being with people on a daily basis. Sometimes the stories are too good and I have to write them down, change them up a bit so that the people who told me, have no idea it was me. Sometimes, I make the better than what was told or I fill in holes left by the customers when they have to leave or I have to go back to doing my work. There are times when I don’t get a story. It’s just the way the person looks. Interesting, as if they would have something to say or an interesting story to tell if I had the time to get it.

TV: yes, I am an avid TV watcher, enjoying a lot of different shows…except for reality TV. Though I do have a few exceptions. When I watch TV, I like to play the “What If?” game. Different endings, what is somebody had said something different, what if the character had reacted another way…just a lot of alternate universes out there and I would like to explore them all

Daydreams: these are the best ideas. I just let my mind wander. If I can, I write down my dreams, or at least fragments of them. I get some vivid ones and they are just too good to let fade into my memories. Long road trips, a late night with little sleep, maybe something weird to eat. Whatever the case may be, I will run with it.

So, my inspirations comes from quite a few different places and I enjoy every bit of it when I comes.

Where does your inspiration come from? Let me know in the comments how some of your best ideas/stories are found?

 

Technorati Tags: romance,writing,inspiration,novels

Self-Publishing Chronicle...

I can honestly say that I have sent my stories to every publisher and agent in the book. Just typed up letters and the query and printed off chapters like it was going out of style. After quite a few rejections and more than a share of no answers at all, I decided that I wanted to take things into my own hands. More like needed to take them into my own hands. So, I made the jump. I decided to self-publish (scary). I honestly felt that people would buy my stories if they were available in print.  

After a lot of searching, researching and just asking questions, I went with Amazon. The process was and still is easy and it just took a lot of stress off my shoulders. Amazon seemed to have the best of both worlds. Easy to upload, tools to help you convert, a forum where you can ask questions (though I have heard it’s a shark tank in there.) You get report on how many sales vs returns. It just had everything that I needed for free. There are other options that I could use that would cost, but right now…free is working for me. 

I will admit that in the beginning, I was hesitant to use the service. Not sure why though. Maybe I built it up to be harder in my head than it was.  

I have to say that I’m glad I did it. It’s a stepping stone in the right direction.

Writing Struggles

Like everyone, I have my issues. My hair, my weight, my wardrobe, my job…this is not unique. But when writing comes into play…things get interesting.

1st-Time. Time waits for no man and writer’s are no exception. Working full time and having a sort of life cuts into the time I would be writing. I set a schedule for myself, but I have yet to make myself stick to it. Call it lack of will power or ambition or…whatever. I struggle daily with the guilt of not writing enough. No answer yet.

2nd- ideas. It’s not a lack of them . More like too much of an abundance of them. That is not a bad thing…really. I just need to write it down and let it stew while I finish my other work. Well, that’s the idea anyway. Sometimes the idea is so strong though, I have to get it out. There is no stopping it and it can haunt my dreams until I do it. At least an outline of some kind, maybe some character sketches…then I focus back on the current book.

3rd-Want. Sometimes, a lot lately, I don’t want to write. The computer screen is lit, the cursor is blinking, but the fingers are sleeping. On days like that, I go over old stories, blog a bit, even pull out a book to read. There is no need to force it. The story is there and it will come out. Forcing it only creates more issues. It’s happening more lately, but that’s due to my life changing…again. I know once it settles down, the juices will flow.

My writing story

I started writing back in middle school. It was going to be a huge mystery story, with twins, poison and a private eye. When we moved from Germany to TX, I lost track of the story, but not the bug. Through high school, I wrote poetry and prose, needing an outlet for my teenage angst that only high schoolers understand. After that, I put the pen away, going through my fair share of ups and downs as I became an adult. Fat forward to college and my 2nd college roommate. She was a writer and talking to her…ignited the bug in me again. I remembered all the love I had for storytelling, the need to see characters who represented me better than what was in mainstream. Don’t get me wrong, I love some Nora Roberts and Linda Howard and Julie Garwood. I just found myself  hungering fro more interracial, more realistic, less…a size 10 and more size 20’s. that’s who I was and still am. I’m a big girl with an appetite for love with knowledge that love isn't always simple. Sometimes you’re at the end of a relationship or you still pine for another or maybe…you just aren’t that emotional. Nothing is wrong with that and I wanted to showcase it.

Then…life hit again. This time a divorce and picking up the pieces. The divorce took a bit of wind out of my sail and where I was writing for hours a day, I now find it a struggle to write for minutes.

I’m coming along though. Slow and sure. I find blogging to be a good way to unplug the dam that I built and the water sometimes gushes, sometimes trickles…but it does flow.

Character Inspiration…

To produce a mighty book, you must choose a mighty theme.
- Herman Melville

The inspiration for my characters in “Perfect Planning,” is not so much a person, but an event. A moment in time that changes the lives of everyone involved. When this moment happens, what do the participants do? How will this moment change them? Will they rise to the occasion or will they falter?

I wanted to see what could happen to all those involved and how they would deal with it. I needed to show how some would react to a change that is both monumental and every day in it’s simplicity. I also wanted to show the dark side of being unbendable, of not acknowledging that sometimes what you think, your beliefs, are wrong and if you don’t change, you run the risk of being left behind. I do touch on racism in this story, as it often comes up in interracial relationships. As much as we want to deny it, it happens and it hurts all those involved. I do put in a twist to this story, because racism is not always black and white, there are layers and hidden feelings that have to be explored and I needed this story to show it.

Perhaps, on a deeper level, this story does reflect some of my history in interracial dating and relationships. I can’t that I being some of the feelings and experiences to this story, but a true writer always does.

 

I’m back…

So I took a long break. Way long, longer than I ever thought. went through a lot things on my break. a divorce, a move home and a move back, but things seem to coming back. the need to write, the urge to be creative is bubbling up and you know what that means…

Writing and other cool stuff.

I’m very excited to try new things, finish my stories and put them out there for others to hopefully enjoy. With that said, enough babbling and on to the good stuff.

Long Time

I know, I haven't been here in a while. A lot has been going on and it’s taken me till now to deal with it enough that I can put it in a blog, let it out so others can relate to what has been going on.

Let’s start with the heavy and go from there.

I’m in the middle of a divorce. Or maybe it’s the end. I can’t really tell anymore. All I know is that my 10 year relationship has imploded and I’m still picking up the pieces. A lot of people will tell me that they are sorry to hear that, that their heart goes out to them, but I’m not in the mood. I just want people to nod and look away. I’m not able to handle the pity or the sorrow or even the despair that some people express at the ending of my marriage. I may never be able to and that’s how I handle things. Just press on until the road runs out. Productive yes…emotionally healthy…not so much.

With that out there, I’m going to take down this blog and go in a new direction, or more like chose a fork in the road and follow it. We are still going to talk about writing, but also crafts, bariatric surgery and recipes. I’m also going to get personal, talk about dreams,wants needs. I’ll probably post some stuff that I’m writing and even some deep thoughts that may make you blush a bit. Sorry about that, but it’s time I condensed my thoughts and words to one place. I have about three other blogs and it’s too hard, too much to keep up with keeping it all separate.

One place…one me. That’s the new motto.

So if you wanna head on over to the new home base, please do. If not, it’s been a good time with you.

http://bariatriccooking.blogspot.com/